Voices in my head

It’s not like I’m going crazy or I’m not sure who I am. I always know I’m me, but there are these characters in my head that say: “What stopped you from finishing that task today? You gave up. You’re wet.”

That particular one is familiar at 4am and is annoying enough to keep me awake, listing all the things I haven’t done well enough up to some ridiculous standard.

What can be done about it at that moment is limited, physically. I could leap up and take steps, or make notes on a handy pad. However, mentally, there is heaps you can do (see Actions) –  if you recognise what’s happening.

What most often occurs is that I try to get back to sleep but toss and turn and basically worry. Now we all know that worry does little except bother us. Yesterday’s gone, tomorrow’s not here, yada yada and concerning ourselves this way can just waste energy.

Even worse than those 4am voices are the daylight ones that get us in a low moment: “You’re lazy, you’re fat, you’re not good enough.”

These I might try and shut them down with ‘medications’ such as reading, TV, movies, eating, and so on. These distractions feel fine to start with but don’t help medium to long-term.

Several helpful methods for tackling these hecklers exist. One approach that’s appealing to me currently is the work of Amy Ahlers and Christine Arylo, founders of the Inner Mean Girls’ Reform School. They have a number of “identities” for the Mean Girls (or Guys) that heckle us*. They work with them to tone down their messages and ultimately have us listen more, instead, to our Inner Wisdom. Sounds like a plan! Declaimer: I have never met these coaches and they are not rewarding me in any way to promote their program.

*Take the free test at www.InnerMeanGirlQuiz.com 

Actions  When you have a ‘Mean’ attack, rather than trying to hide from it, shut it down, distract your mind or any of those other techniques which don’t work well in the long term, try this acronym, ASA:

  1. Acknowledge them. They’re just trying to keep you safe, on their level.
  2. Stay with them for a while. Sometimes we act too fast to shut down the message. Often it can take only a minute or two for the sharpness of the message to melt away.
  3. Appreciate. Find something you’re grateful for right then and there and marinade in it.

When these simple steps help, do let me know. And if you’re looking for further and deeper support around letting loose the amazing person you know you are inside, contact me. See if my programs are your backup.

Taking a bite

Don’t be distracted by criticism, remember the only taste of success some people have is when they take a bite out of you. – Zig Ziglar

Do I need a coach?  If you’ve already got a lot going on and you’re doing quite well, you might think a coach isn’t necessary. And you may be right. You could be getting all the encouragement and inspiration you need from the things you read and the people around you.

If however there is a constant niggle – not a Mean nagger – but a whisper from your Inner Wisdom that’s telling you you need a different path, to bring a dream to fruition, that you’re really aiming too low, talk to a coach and see if they can hold the space for you to develop further.

To see if that coach is me and that I’m right for a potential partnership, contact me for a preliminary chat and I’ll let you know if we’ve got a path in common this year. Call +61 413 610350.

Contact me, I want to hear your voice!

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Peace in our time

Wainamu Luxury Tents, North Island, NZ.

I spent time with a dear friend recently. She believes that a big contributor to her present peaceful state is a new loving-kindness practice.

The practice generally seeks to spread ease and joy to those we love, those who bug us, and by extension to all the world. One of the most powerful aspects, she explained, was that the first step extends those things to oneself.

Loving-kindness can be promulgated with meditation and other ways. The spoken parts of the meditations tend to go along the lines: ‘May I be safe, may I be happy, may I be healthy, may I live with ease.’ Then these requests are directed towards others.

Coincidentally, a few months ago I heard about the ancient Hawaiian ‘prayer’ of Ho’oponopono. This does something similar, by sending forgiveness and love to those we care about and/or those we don’t.

I read that the concept has been widespread through Polynesia. The wording goes something like this: ‘I’m sorry, Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.’

A fellow coach who introduced this told me about how her partner, not usually a big “woo woo” guy, surprising her: “He casually asked me if my week had been going well. ‘Well yes!’ I answered, enumerating all the ways that things had functioned better than usual. He smirked and said ‘I’ve been sending you Ho’oponopono all week!’”

Now whether you believe these things have effect or not, I’m noticing their power among people I know and trust. Claims are made that these practices do reduce cortisol (stress hormone) in those regularly using them, and other scientific results.

If you’re interested, examples are easily found on Google and You Tube.

Seat at Urquharts Bay walk, New Zealand.

 

Actions

If you’re looking for peace in your life, look up a practice and try it.

Let me know if this works for you. I’d love to hear.

 

 

Peace by force?  

Peace cannot be kept by force; it can only be achieved by understanding. – Albert Einstein

Passion flower, Annandale, NSW, Australia.

If your mind is at peace, but you have nothing else, you can be happy. If you have everything the world can give – pleasure, possessions, power – but lack peace of mind, you can never be happy. - Dada Vaswani

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Into the cave

Cave at Bethells Beach (Te Henga) New Zealand.

 

When on holiday in New Zealand in February we went to the Poor Knights. Named by Captain Cook, these fingers of rock poking out of the sea 22 km off shore are the remains of a volcano. They are like a local Galapagos.

The islands are the home to the dinosaur relative, the tuatara reptile, and many sea birds. There are wonderful arches, one that our boat with 50 people on board squeaked through.

And there are small caves to snorkel into.

Now I don’t really like caves, the idea of them being a dead end, the tons of rock above you, they freak me out a bit. I wouldn’t have gone into two small caves at the Poor Knights unless the guide hadn’t urged us to and assured us it was OK.

Even so, with Shark’s Cave (the shape of a fin), you’re looking at a narrow opening in the virtually sheer rock wall. There’s a bit of a swell and you wonder if it will bash you against the walls or ceiling.

But with the idea that it’s worth doing, you take the plunge, you kick hard and pass through the narrow opening. My husband said “my shoulders won’t fit through” but they did. Inside, the walls open out and there’s more space, but it’s still so dark you feel blind.

Only when you turn and look back do you get it.

Light floods in from the opening and illuminates the fish inside the cave and bathes everything a pearlescent turquoise. And if you regain your calm and stay for a while, your eyes adjust and you can see about you overhead, too.

I burst out of that cave with the thrill of being alive and filled with wonder at nature’s magnificence.

Contrasting caves  Strangely enough, the moment I got home I went into a cave of a different kidney. The metaphorical kind where joy as well as light seems absent. A few business things I’d planned had fallen over and I lost my energy and drive. Admitted I was starting a cold and the usual comfortable homecoming seemed dismal instead.

More than just a holiday hangover, I felt black for few days. What’s the use, I thought? Why try at all? Nothing’s going to come of it and all the effort in the world isn’t going to make a dead horse go.

You might know this cave, it occurs with many of us from time to time.*

Even in this cave there are ways of approaching it. At first, I was just in it. If I looked at all I saw nothing of inspiration, only the dead end. After a couple of days of coughing on the couch I viewed some pix from our holiday and recalled the wonder and fun and exhilaration we’d experienced.

Gradually I took a couple of steps. Sent a couple of emails. It wasn’t all bad. The equivalent of growing accustomed to the dark, perhaps. Then I turned myself around and reestablished some connections with fantastic people, and did some learning to build new opportunities for myself and my clients.

Sure as in Shark’s Cave on those offshore islands of New Zealand, that ‘looking out’ perspective began to shine.

*   *   *   *

*Fortunately I don’t go there for extended periods and my thoughts go out to those who do. These actions are not about tackling that depth of blackness.

Actions

North and South islands NZ as jandals (thongs/flipflops).

Go the New Zealand! It’s an amazing place full of spectacular nature, not to mention great people, food and wine.

Seriously, if you’re feeling dark and “in a cave”:

  1. Don’t rush straight out, necessarily. It might not be comfortable, but the ideas you have in there may in time be seen to have lead you to totally new ways of understanding your situation.
  2. Revolve. Look at where you’ve come from, how far you’ve come. What courage it’s taken to get there.
  3. Observe the glory of the cave’s contents, details illuminated by the light.
  4. Get out of there when you’re ready, and with a direction to aim for.

 

Being off line I was virtually off-line for two weeks recently in New Zealand.

In a way, being so disconnected for a time was fantastic. It was refreshing and left me very open to take in what was before me then and there. Apologies if this left anyone hanging.

 

Opportunity

A couple of bods have had to drop out of my Tea Party Retreat in Manly on March 21.

That means some spots have opened up for you to get your gorgeousness on and to experience just how magnificent you are.

Once you have that in your bones, your relationships and income can’t but improve, providing you’re one of the appropriate candidates to try this work.

Wanna join us? Call me on 0413 610 350 – I promise to answer this time!

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Now you see them….

Books have always meant so much to me.

I was read to as a child, I learned to read early. In an austere time, those books and their illustrations provided a sense of abundance, colour, rich sensuousness and imagery that fed my imagination. They were a wonderful education, escape, treat and friend.

I got glasses for shortsightedness aged 9, but probably much earlier books were always in focus when other things more distant weren’t and I learned to trust them.

Once I was reading for myself I was the classic “under the covers with a torch after lights out” type.

Luxury is a library

So, for much of my life I dreamed of a library as the true luxury. Walls of books, high as the ceiling, perhaps with a sliding ladder!

I continued to collect them, weeding from time to time to preserve quality and for space.

Twenty months ago we packed up the family home and ditched a lot of stuff, including many books but still boxed up plenty of reading treasures, ones I planned to re-read, picture tomes, those I could lend to others and maybe pass on to my children.

We’re renting a place now with little book space so most of those boxes stayed inland at a cheaper storage spot. Now they’ve moved near to us and we’re dealing with them. Mind you, once you’ve lived without something for so long mostly you don’t need it any more.

But books? I thought they’d always be in my life. I’ve literally had this image of my future library all my reading life.

Since access to most of my books has been restricted, I’ve become more at ease with using my Kindle, first acquired for travel – books really are heavy. I’ve swapped the joy of the tactility, smell and lendability of physical books to the lightness, and ‘let’s buy the next in the series right now at 4am’ – ability of the digital library. And it measures 11 by 17 cm. Not the same, but oh so efficient.

Finally, when I’m close to the position to have my ultimate dream library, I find I don’t need it. I’m shocked. I could take all those lovely friends out of their boxes and I can give most of them away, except for some heirloom leather-bound poems. The rest I can always access.

The ambition I’ve held for decades has melted. Ironic and surprising, the brave new digital world has changed me.

If something so fundamental can transmute gently and completely out of the corner of one’s eye, what else long-held as solid needs a reboot? What could we start rethinking?

Is it your job? Relationships? Your image of yourself? Is it the path you’ve envisaged that no longer takes you where you’re most repleat?

For example, if you don’t yet see yourself as magnificent, come along to my Tea Party Retreat on March 21 to refresh your vision of yourself and what you’re capable of.

And if anyone is interested in some good books, I’ve got a lot available!

Actions

  1. Choose a peaceful place with no interruptions. Turn off your phone and shut your computer.
  2. Get settled, grounded, and breath deeply for a few breaths.
  3. Take something you know to be true. It’s immovably the way you’ve thought of it for ages. The way it is, for sure. Set in stone. (Such as my ‘I must have a big library’).
  4. Now, tease it out a bit. What if that stone-like concept had fuzzy edges. What if it wasn’t a stone at all, but a sponge, a feather, a flowing stream?
  5. What if it’s changed direction and going off in a completely different dimension?
  6. Sit with that and let your concepts broaden.
  7. If you like that, take an action step towards your new idea. (If you don’t, you’ll still see your original concept differently).
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Lorikeets, or First Impressions Rule

“Squawk squawk screech,” the lorikeets so loud in the front yard one morning is my first conscious experience. So early, and so raucous.

To me it’s like: “Look at me! I’m upside down! Come on Chaz and Suze, over here! It’s amazing in this tree!” I start to giggle. My husband thinks it’s: “Yahoo, let’s all go to the pub!”

Rainbow Lorikeets* don’t strike just us that way, Wikipedia describes them as “hyperactive and clownish in personality”. They’re lairs all right. Do you know the term “lair”? Think of a young bloke getting into his best clobber, revving up his big ute and going to town on Friday night to go “lairising”.

The day before, woken equally early by crashing and screeching trucks and equipment — a different sound although probably of similar decibels — I took it quite differently. “Shut up,” was my first reaction. Moan, groan.

I think the rest of each day turned out in line with those first thoughts. The one pretty joyful and cheery, the other pushing it up hill.

How we set ourselves up in the morning can have quite an impact on our whole day. I’ve heard Louise Hay say the first thing she does on waking is thank her bed for the lovely sleep. Getting that gratitude going out of the gate.

Interested in trying to make your day better? More enjoyable, filled with ease, more successful and achieving? The try these actions and report back.

Actions

a) Observe – Tomorrow morning as soon as you reach consciousness, notice when happens. Is it complaints oh my aching knee; stressful thoughts OMG I haven’t completed that document yet? Is it scarcity – I haven’t had enough sleep, how am I going to get through my day with enough energy?

That last one used to be me all the time in my final corporate job, and boy did it come true, day after week. I’d be snacking inappropriately to try and get enough oomph to make it to the end of the day.

b) Next day – prepare yourself the night before. Put intentions out there to immediately go for joy, abundance, gratitude, or noticing what’s here and now – being fully present.

Even before your eyes are open, hear the things you normally hear and see if you can up-level your take on them.

c) Let me know if this changed anything for you. I really want to hear if it was helpful or whatever. Just a quick text to 0413 610 350. That’s +61 and drop the first 0 for those outside Australia. Or an email, or comment on my Facebook Page ‘Glenda Thompson for flourisheer’.

Do it! Don’t leave me twisting out here by myself. Connect and share!

Even if it’s to say ‘Don’t be such a tosser — how could that ever shape my whole day?’

Tea Party Retreat

Dessert from Felix, Sydney.

I’ve got such a treat coming up. My tribal afternoon tea late last year had such a beautiful energy that I’ve been inspired to combine that concept with some amazing training.

Want to find out just how magnificent you are and can be? And how that flows on to benefit your work, health and relationships? Then this is for you.

The event, Tea Party Retreat, is nothing right wing politically, like the name might represent in North America! It’s a small group format where you take part and contribute to the outcomes. And it’s fun.

It’s on March 21 in Manly from 1-5pm. For the first time price of only $100 you receive the teaching, sharing with a small group, and a fabulous afternoon tea to boot.

The retreat is already somewhat subscribed, and I’d love you to be there.

Come on, Magnificent One. Join us.

Reach me by midday February 19 to be included.

 

 

 

 

 

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How deep is your love?

In the US winter at the moment: one friend couldn’t get enough ice off her car to be able to drive to her exercise class. Also, this was on film, snow stopped people leaving their house for 24 hours because it simply piled up outside and stopped the door from opening.

Amazing. I can’t even imagine dealing with that kind of weather. I’m a wimp about the cold.

But when it comes to the reverse, I’m remembering Arizona last July was insanely hot. My target was the expansive pool at the resort where our Mastermind group was meeting. It was quite late in the evening when I hugged a fellow-participant goodnight. “You’re COOL,” she said, astounded*. Yes, she and her fellow northern hemisphereans had been BY the pool, not IN the pool. To an Australian with plenty of experience of heat, it was a no-brainer. Flitting around the outside is not going to do it for you. You got to get in.

Pool at Shute Harbour, Queensland, Australia.

You got to get in. It’s a metaphor for real commitment, too. Hanging around the edge of something is probably not going to deliver the results you seek. Really engaging is what you need to do.

Examples Maybe you go to a networking event but stay chatting with friends instead of meeting new people. That’s is not going to deliver a broadened reach, a potential new friend/supplier/client or JV partner is it? Just dangling toes in the water.

Maybe you’re dying for a better job. Trolling through the online jobs sites and bookmarking targets is not going to get you more power, money or respect unless you dive in, apply, have your ducks in a row and tackle any subsequent interviews with a real energy of availability. Otherwise it’s still hanging by the pool.

What about when we complain we haven’t got enough peeps on our list or in our client base? Do we really take the steps to talk to enough individuals who don’t yet know us or our wares to address that imbalance?

I’m good at singling out these kind of things because I have LOTS of experience in this too. And the skills to help you through this.

We know we know we know it’s not likely to serve us to flit and flirt on the surface with our issues and avoid going deep where solving them is more likely. We know going subterranean is the answer. We know commitment brings the magic.

* Yes maybe it would also have been a shock to find me ‘cool’ in the other sense too!

Quiz – Are you half hearted?

Last time you set out on a path, was there any element of self-sabotage there? It can ‘save’ you from the fears that often arise when you really engage full out with what you want. These include fear of ‘failure’, fear of ‘success’ and everything in between.

Bought a business/self development book recently? Have you:

  1. Started it, honestly, and left it by your bed gathering dust as something easier or more entertaining came along?
  2. Skimmed it and vowed to get back to it ‘sometime’?
  3. Read it fast and moved on to the next thing without ever pondering your takeaways or ever applying one idea from it?
  4. Read it thoroughly and have incorporated three tips in your life or business that you use all the time?
  5. Left it still sitting there in your Kindle, untouched.

Answers: Everything but 4, you’re still twisting by the pool. And if you’re doing it there, it’s possible you’re doing it everywhere. Work, relationships, money. If this has preventing you getting on, contact me for support and to see if I’m ‘your person’. Call +61 (0)413 610 350.

Digging deep

Believe in yourself, take on your challenges, dig deep within yourself to conquer fears. Never let anyone bring you down. You got to keep going. – Chantal Sutherland

“… deep roots are not reached by the frost.” — JRR Tolkien

 

 

 

 

 

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Trim for growth

You know when you have a shrub that’s got woody and overgrown, and it’s not putting out many fruit or flowers? You prune the branches down to the green, get rid of the old growth and allow for fresh branches to shoot. You get new leaves and flowers and renew the entire bush.

OK, so I was supposed to be doing something else more urgent and important, but I found myself unsubscribing from dozens of senders whose messages I receive regularly in my email inbox.

I had asked for them for one reason or another originally. But who wants all those notices banging into your consciousness every day? Who has time for that many pieces of info and advice?

There were many that I was just ignoring and never opened any more, but just the fact of having to assess them and decide anew whether to open them was energy I could have been using better elsewhere.

I’ve cut down those in my primary inbox to five of the most interesting and informative and those most aligned with my path this year. I still have to cut many out of my promotional inbox, but already I feel freer and more relaxed. It is cleaner, clearer and I will be making space for more useful and powerful things to grow. Just like the shrub.

Recommendation  An action I recommend for the beginning of the year or a new phase is to simplify things. Now, on days when I’m distracted and not concentrating, I won’t get so sucked into going through those inboxes and letting the shiny objects, that promise a lot but often just take up my time and attention for no result, waste my precious energy.

In my recent experience a trim inbox can give me new life. What else can we trim to start our year with freer energy and a cleaner slate? A hair cut, a ‘go through’ of your wardrobe, an edit of your library, a winnowing of your office cupboards. Weed a patch of your garden and mulch it so weeds will be few in future.

Take a clear-eyed look at your scheduled meetings for the first quarter. Do you REALLY “have to”, ie choose to, do everything you had in your diary last year this year? Don’t automatically take on duties without giving them the test – are they right for you now?

Actions

1. List your regular in-mail, commitments or other responsibilities you think you’ve got to schedule this quarter.

2. If someone made you reduce them by 90 per cent, which would you keep?

3. Keep those and if you must, add only a FEW more – leaving plenty of room for new and invigorating opportunities to pop up.

4. Put it out there in the universe that you are now open to and welcoming amazing new influences.

5. See what happens.

Do let me know if this works for you and if you have any amazeballs additions insert themselves in your life that you have now made space for them.

Congratulations. And sometimes even the awareness that our commitments aren’t set in stone is a great first step.

I’d love it if you keep me on as one of your treasured regular blogs! But if you’ve never had any joy out of the Flourisheer newsletter, don’t see yourself ever connecting with me in the future, or if you feel it’s not speaking to you any more, let it go … I’m walkin’ mah talk here.

VIP Day

This is an intensive and immersive experience to get where you’re going fast, all in the one day. I have two dates available for VIP days before mid-February. One of them could be yours!

Contact me on 0413 610 350 to secure your spot. Come on over, it will be wonderful.

 

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Finding real refreshment

Went for a great snorkel last week. There were five of us and although it was a bit choppy on the surface of our local spot, Fairy Bower, we saw a huge wobbegong in all its camouflage glory and the curious weed-like protrusions around its mouth.

Back on shore, one of us was saying he got light-headed afterwards, one was still grappling with getting his gear right. What about you, said one? I’m ecstating, I replied. I think you must be part fish, she said.

Two days later I was with a friend who rarely gets her feet wet. She was happy to lie on the rocks and take in the scene. I got out after my snork and reported I was cold, happy, hungry for a coffee and a few other sensations. But above all, serene. The peace that comes with connecting to this other world of mine is delicious and deep. It stays with me for hours afterwards.

So this is what I want for you this year. Connect to your joy, whatever that may be for you. Take that glorious feeling back into the rest of life as often as may be.

Understand the refreshment, creativity, and soul food that’s available to restore your heart, your body, your ideas that way.

That’s it.

Get Clear and Get Traction

If you already suspect you could value some coaching, you may want to start pronto with the Clear and Traction package. This can get you clarity around what is calling out to be different for you. Do you want a better job? More respect? To use your efforts for good? You can get started on that path now. The C and T package can have you on your way in no time. Imagine feeling better already this time next week or even sooner?

Deciding already changes everything. Call me now on 0413610350 or email to Glenda@glendathompson.com.au and we can get into YOUR stuff and start sorting it out straight away.

We begin with a 90 minute starter session and three other 60 min sessions, plus phone and email support, and other goodies. To learn more about this paid package let’s talk and we can we discuss your next steps.

We have to agree on the fit and the circumstances, and this is where you start getting more power straight away. You decide whether this is right for you, and you decide when you can get started.

 

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Try the Flipping Game

I love water. It’s hard to imagine but I reckon I would be a shell of a person without plenty of it. To drink, cook with, wash and the ocean to snorkel in.

A wonderful interview I viewed a few days ago was all about a young man who inadvertently tried The Flipping Game and ended up bringing life-saving and dignity-providing clean water to millions.

Do you know the game? Let me tell you more.

Scott Harrison lived a decadent life from age 18 to 28 as a nightclub promoter in New York city. He relished unlimited free drink, drugs, girls, holiday houses, and luxury, but at one point he realised it was for him spiritually and morally bankrupt.

What would happen, he wondered, if he could do something completely the opposite? He was played The Flipping Game. It had a profound effect. He decided to volunteer in Africa and was turned down repeatedly until one outfit said he could come on their mercy ship as long he paid them.

Great, he thought. It’s the opposite of what I’ve been doing and I have to pay them to do it. So it started. Now he runs charity:water which has brought 4 million people clean water.

If you want to see the interview go to http://www.marieforleo.com/2014/12/charity-water-scott-harrison/  But wait until you’ve got to my point first, OK?

Now I’m not saying we’re all decadent and need to start charities. Unless you want to. What came out of this specifically for me was the idea of using The Flipping Game where you think you are secure in what you want, yet it doesn’t please you.

What if you tried it for your career. Maybe you’ve been saying for years: “I need this job”, as in “I need to work hard at this role, even though I dislike it, because it’s providing me with the lifestyle I choose.”

Just allow yourself a few moments to flip it. “I don’t need this job.” Maybe you’d come up with: “I could choose to reduce my costs, I could retrain or travel or sell something to try some work I really love.”

Or the reverse: “I’ve been trying and trying my hardest to make my business work and it’s just not happening.” Allow yourself to imagine giving it away, selling it, taking a sabbatical, putting in a manager, I don’t know, the situation in yours and you have to give yourself permission to let the ideas come.

This is especially for you if you’ve been struggling with something on your own, it’s not changing, and you have never yet had help with it. Flip your approach and get a powerful coaching session with me to illuminate your way forward. Start the new year with the juice of a fresh approach. Call me.

Action – Try The Flipping Game

  1. Select your subject. You may be fully aware of that thing you’re trying to push up hill. Or, where you use the phrase “I have to…” is often a fruitful space to start.
  2. State your current position, for example, “I have to…blah blah.”
  3. Give yourself space and grace to suspend judgment and allow some magic to show up.
  4. Flip It. “I have to…” can become “I don’t have to …” Even more powerfully, state it without the negative. “I have to wash the dog every day,” becomes “I can let the dog go dirty.”
  5. Life-shifting lessons can come from this game. If you need help with it, get me on board. I can help you reframe your issue. We can clarify change and let you see a new way to go.

*Don’t worry about that lovely dirty dog. One day won’t matter and if he’s REALLY grubby, maybe someone else will give him a bath for a change.

Alternative Giving It doesn’t always have to come out of your purse. Give of yourself: write a fun document vowing to cook their dinner, babysit, wash the car, mow the lawn, take them shopping, take them for a walk every Sunday for a month, or whatever would work for you and the recipient.

Prize winner Grace Jones won my Grow the Tribe contest. Revealing the Sur-prise:  the winner could choose or negotiate her own prize. Instead of some training or another product, Grace and I are going to spend some social time together as her request. I’m all yours, Grace.

This is my last newsletter for the year and a great year it has been. I’ve loved sharing my experiences and tips via this channel. I’ve also really enjoyed working with you and you have thrilled me the way you have grown in awareness, ability and cut-through.

Have a beautiful festive season and here’s to a magnificent 2015!

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When Your Goal is a Scourge

Setting goals is all very well but what to do when they’ve turned into hideous scourges for us to beat ourselves up with?

I had a particular aim for my business which, nine or ten months ago, I thought was realistic and I nailed my flag to it.

Now I’m close to that date and I’m not going to reach the target and it’s been making me unhappy.

Solution One

What I’ve worked out is that the idea is still good, the target achievable, and all I need to do to make it better is to change the deadline. I can’t tell you the pressure – self-imposed pressure – that this has relieved for me.

Our tribe gets together - it was nourishing, relaxing and fun.

When we get into a state, our stressed energy means things are less likely to work out anyway. So we’re pushing uphill all the way.

Other options could include reducing the size of the target, enlisting help, and letting yourself relinquish it. But call me determined, OK ‘a bloody dog with a bone’ as my nearest and dearest sometimes say, I like achieving things and it’s what I want and what serves my clients best and me and my family and lifestyle best, too.

So I’m not giving up at all: just reframing. Ahh!

The killer overlay What’s changed for me this year is that the WAY I want to achieve this target, and others, is in an entirely different style.

In the past I could get just about anything up once I put my mind to it. Be it responsibility, duty, creativity or fun, once I committed I could almost always get it up – even if it involved pulling an all-nighter, straining my health, ditching other roles and putting everything else on the line. That’s “pushing” energy* and while it can get the focused task done over a short while, there can be a huge cost to employing that style all the time.

Give yourself the space to relax, release and let go of the tight fisted hold you were having on your project. Rest for a wee bit and then get going again, knowing that getting into “flow” is going to provide the best results.

*See ‘Allowing Energy Week’ blog from May 2014.

Actions Is an ambition or aim messing you around because it’s not happened in the time frame you set?

  1. Can the time be changed?
  2. Extend it (within reason) and feel the release.
  3. This is not permission to relax and twiddle your thumbs for months until the deadline looms again and then stress out. Getting juiced on “deadline energy” is not what I’m teaching here.
  4. Take the opportunity to practice “allowing” energy.
  5. Articulate your project to the universe or whichever entity you prefer to co-share responsibility with you for success.
  6. Allow good things to flow – including help: consider reversing your answer if your response is always, “It’s OK, I can do it!”

Let me know how it goes.

Contest – with Prize

There is an unmovable deadline for our Grow Our Tribe Contest Dec 16, one week from today.

Send me good-fit candidates for either receiving this blog or for coaching with me and win Flourisheer points! That’s one each for the blog and five each for every potential client. Yay.

Most points earns the surprise prize (the sur-prize?) which will be very exciting for the winner. Want to know why? You have to get into it to find out. Hmmm… go on, give it a go.

Call me on 0413610350 or (02)99777365 with entries or any questions. Also email details to glenda@glendathompson.com.au

Thank you so much. I’m enjoying receiving your respect, love and attention with this contest.

 

 

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